A quiet night in
by phantom.ryder
Summary: One shot ficlet during the Fumoffu season... Kaname tries to teach Sousuke the beauty of a quiet night in. But the trigger happy Sergeant along with his commander and squad mates make sure to add general weirdness and chaos to the situation.


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Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of characters used. All are licensed to their respective owners. I am not making any money through authorship of this fic.

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It had been a rough week for Kaname Chidori, class assignments had been hurtling towards her from left, right and center, she was under serious stress due to her class rep duties and to top it all off Sousuke had been acting a little more protective than usual. And that was saying something.

Since the horror that had been her week was now coming to an end, Kaname decided to spend her Friday night watching anime like any normal Japanese high school student. Her show of choice, of course was the best feel-good comedy she could find, _Azumanga Daioh_.

"Alright girls", she said to the t.v screen as she put her feet up, "Work your magic."

She pressed play, and about a minute before the opening theme was about to come on, she heard a familiar voice shouting from right outside her door.

"Alright Sousuke, what are you shouting about this time?!" Kana demanded as she opened her door to reveal Sousuke as expected, along with three other familiar faces.

"Oh, Chidori, hello," was all the young Sergeant could manage to get out before he was grabbed and thrown into the room.

"Don't you even try to sound like you're surprised to see me Sousuke! I live here!" Kaname said before clearing her throat and smiling at the three other people looking uncomfortable standing outside her door.

"Tessa, Kurz, Melissa, would you like to come in?"

"Sorry to drop in like this Kaname," began Tessa. "But we thought we'd surprise you! It's been a while since we've all had a little R and R together."

Sousuke sat at the corner of the room rubbing his head.

"Why is it that they get a polite greeting?" he wondered aloud.

"Because I couldn't hear them trying to yell the building down from outside my apartment!"

"I was merely trying to dissuade them from coming tonight. I knew that you've been in a rather aggravated mood this week and I thought that you would enjoy a night off for yourself."

"Sousuke, is that true?," Kaname asked, now feeling a little sorry that she had yelled at him.

"Well, it's close enough," said Mao as she walked straight into the apartment and sat down on the sofa.

Tessa and Kurz followed her example, the latter not being able to resist opening his mouth.

"Actually, what Sergeant Sousuke over there said was, 'don't go near her tonight for she is very aggravated and would more than likely try to attack you as soon as you were in range'."

Kaname shot Sousuke a monster glare.

"What? Why do you look as if you're angry with me again? I informed you earlier that, that's what I had said."

"That is not what you said you said!" Kaname shouted as she pulled out her harisen.

smack

"Oww Chidori, that hurt."

"Good!!"

--

A moment or two later after much apologising from Sousuke all five were seated in front of the t.v.

"So what is the purpose of this 'night-in?'"

"Don't talk to me right now Sousuke, it's not safe." Kaname answered immediately.

She then caught his dejected look and felt a pang of guilt.

"Ok, I'm sorry Sousuke," she sighed. "The purpose of this night-in is to give yourself a break. Just take your troubles off the real world for a while and relax you know?"

"So we're not trying to obtain information from those girls?," Sousuke asked referring to the six that were now showing on screen.

"No. We're not trying to gain information as such, this is just for fun. Don't you guys ever watch anything just for fun?"

"Contact sports," said Mao while taking a sip of her self-provided beer.

"I'm not really very familiar with the concept either," said Tessa. "Too busy I guess."

Sousuke looked thoughtful.

"Yes," he said.

"Yes what?," Kaname asked him.

"I think I know what you mean when you say 'watching for fun' sometimes Kurz watches movies in his private time. He says the purpose is to just 'have a little fun'."

"Well the purpose is to have a little something alright," said Mao with a smirk.

Kaname turned red, Kurz tried to hide his embarrassment and Tessa wondered what on Earth everyone was talking about.

Sousuke shrugged and turned his attention back to the screen with the others soon doing the same thing.

Mao was still shooting Kurz a few smirks though.

"What's the matter Mr. Sagara? Why do you look so confused?," asked Tessa as she looked over at Sousuke.

"I'm not confused as such but… these girls, they are normal yet very odd."

"Well that's one thing they have in common with a certain someone here," said Kaname offhandedly as she continued to watch the program.

The episode she had chosen to put on was one of her favourites, the second year culture fest. On screen at that exact moment was Chiyo-chan in her penguin costume being pushed over by her homeroom teacher.

"Why are they abusing that adorable child?" asked Sousuke.

"They're not abusing her Sousuke, they're just teasing."

"First they forced her to wear that ridiculous penguin outfit and then proceed to push her over and laugh at her immobilisation. I find this disgraceful!"

Kaname sighed. 'I should have expected this of him. It's ruining the feel good factor of the show!"

"And where are all the men?," Sousuke continued. "The only one I've seen so far is that ridiculous looking one that had his mouth hanging open as he flailed his arms about. And he was dressed in a striped swimming costume. This again, is very odd."

"Oh Sousuke, just watch it ok? That was just Mr. Kimura. He's a serious pervert so they just play his character for laughs."

Kurz, for some reason, looked slightly uncomfortable with this idea.

"A pervert?!," asked Sousuke. "Why don't they shoot him? He shouldn't be allowed to be near High School girls."

"I agree completely," piped up Tessa. "Do they ever try to arrest him?"

"Kimura? No, I don't think so…"

"Well they should," said Sousuke who was now settled on the idea.

"Kiddies. It's just a show! Let it go and just watch it!," said Mao a little happier than usual. Her fourth drink must have done the trick."

Sousuke again returned his attention to the screen until he found something else to ask about.

"That tall girl. The extremely well proportioned one, does she have some sort of psychotic obsession with small animals?"

"Huh? Sakaki? She just likes cute things."

'Well proportioned?,' asked Tessa in her head as she looked down at her own body. 'Then, what am I?'

'Whoa,' thought Kurz who was now sharing Mao's beer. 'Hot girl.'

Kaname looked around her. Her scheduled night in was going about as well as her week.

She had one rather depressed looking billion dollar nuclear submarine captain, two nearly drunk army specialists and another one who looked as if he was about to pull out his gun.

Kaname didn't have to wait long for Sousuke to finally explode, although she lacked the foresight to expect anything literal in this case.

Sousuke saw the instance when Chiyo and Osaka walked around the culture fest on their break.

"They are now using the adorable child… as free advertising! That's child labour!," he yelled. "This show is unacceptable… it must cease at once!"

"Sousuke you idiot don't you dare!"

bang

"You _shot _my t.v?"

"I…"

"You _SHOT _ my tv!!"

"I.. it was just a blank.."

"That blank just blew up my tv!"

"I'll fix it?"

"You better! Right after I fix you!!," Kaname screamed as she pulled out her harisen for another Sousuke beating.

"All I wanted was to watch a few good episodes! Quietly! And what do you do?," asked Kaname as she chased the rather distressed Sousuke around the room.

"I'm sorry!," he called over his shoulder.

"You're dead!"

"Can I just be sorry?"

"Dead!!!"

By this time the two drinkers were fast asleep cuddled on the couch together and their superior was busy with the remote rewinding and fastforwarding to the parts that involved Sakaki just so she could compare their body types.

Yes, for Kaname Chidori, It had been a very rough week indeed…

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AN: Thanks very much for taking the time to read this, my first FMP fic. Just getting used to giving the characters a run through, sorry that it was a very basic first shot. Please review and tell me what you think.


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